Infotainment

Michael Gross Summer is quickly approaching! So quickly, in fact, that I haven’t even had a chance to shop for any new hot weather apparel. I bet Lady Gaga has this same issue — the girl’s too busy giving birth to her little monsters and reconstructing her bones for beauty.

Believe me, I understand that glamor and the creation of a new race of people takes a huge amount of time.

With all of this worrying about the upcoming summer, I’ve really put myself into panic mode as a vast number of questions populate my head: What shall I write about this week? What’s this summer’s must-have item? What’s the one thing many gay men absolutely love about the summer?

And, no, I don’t mean a weekend getaway on a cruise, involving a bubble bath party and all you can eat shrimp. I’m talking about swimwear!

Whether you’re taking a trip to the beach or going on vacation to Provincetown, every gay man shouldn’t leave home without packing some sort of swimsuit.

For many men, their swim trunks are used strictly for functional reasons like swimming, surfing and lounging by the pool drinking beer. But for many other gay and bi men, swimwear is all about the fashion and sex appeal — and showing off their “natural goodies” to all who choose to gawk.

Here are a few options that’ll keep you both cool and sexy for the beach and summer activities.

For a basic look that’s not so basic, board shorts are a good choice when strutting along those summer shores. If you’re looking for comfort when swimming or just for relaxing by the pool, this style of shorts will do the trick. Designed to fit at either knee length or longer, board shorts are also ideal for people who surf. And, yes, gay guys like to surf!

Though board shorts can be worn baggy or fitted more tightly, shopping for shorts that have a slimming fit will still help show off your figure. Remember, shorts that are too baggy can make your body look disproportionally bigger than you actually are.

If you want to feature more of your physical assets when you’re walking along the streets of P-Town or Fire Island, take it a step further by sporting square cut shorts. These types of shorts are fitted and are intended to wear along your upper thighs and hips, helping to emphasize the derrière.

For the boys who carry a little bit more in the caboose such as myself, I highly recommend these shorts — they’re absolutely cute and if you have a voluptuous build you might as well show it off, right? Incorporating a light shirt or a flattering sheer button down can really make this simple and alluring look for the beach something very chic.

When exploring more revealing styled swimwear such as square cut shorts, take the opportunity to try out vibrant colors that really “pop.” Doing so draws a lot of attention to your swim attire as well as bringing a tiny dash of fun into your style for the look you’re trying to flaunt.

To the men who really want to, um, turn heads, if you’re a brave soul that’s able to pull off this next look, then I suggest the bikini cut swimsuit, or even the thong, two styles of which very few men dare to wear.

Like the square cut shorts, bikini cuts and thongs are fitted and are usually worn along the upper thighs and, let’s just say, reveal a little bit more than any other bathing suits sold in retail.

To the men who enjoy a challenge, be warned: this kind of swimwear can fit a bit tighter, and lack comfort if you don’t have a size that fits your build. Finding a fit that’s proportional to your body type really makes a difference in how a particular swimsuit fits, especially this kind. Be sure to give that banana hammock a little test drive before wandering the poolside as eye candy.

But if you have the confidence to wear a thong or bikini cut, by all means go for it! Personally, I find it quite refreshing to see men who are comfortable enough with their manhood cross certain boundaries and display that “I am fierce!” attitude, despite the possible reactions.

Before the hot weather arrives, now is a great time to start shopping for that new swimsuit. Retail stores like Macy’s and Marshalls will have board shorts available in a number of styles. As for other kinds of swimsuits, H&M, and many online stores such as Amazon or Zappos sell various brands of swimwear that are of great quality.

Once you’ve found that hot new swimsuit, grab the sunscreen, your sunglasses, plus some arm candy, and go show off that new suit you’ve searched long and hard for. If you get a few heads to turn your direction, then that means I did my job! If not, then I obviously need to have a little chat with a few jealous bitches.

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It is underwear designer Andrew Christian’s goal in life to give men the same erotic zone enhancements that women have. He’s long promoted package-lifting briefs (with Show-It technology!). Then he came out with butt-lifting garments (with Flashback technology!). And now he’s basically just inserting prosthetics into your underroos to tell all the guys in the locker room: it’s fake, and it’s fabulous.

With Shock Jock Flirt technology(!), Christian’s new line of briefs and boxers feature a pouch to insert this plastic thingy that comes sculpted with the outline of a penis, so it’ll show through your briefs while you’re parading around the spa changing room.

(Hilariously, the company is pitching the technology as a way to add two inches to your frontal silhouette as well as prevent “zipper injury.”)

It’s perfect for guys who weren’t blessed in that department, but I see a real market in trans men who haven’t had surgery below the waist, but still want to be able to flaunt some manhood.

Between this innovation and Lady Gaga’s new Polaroid glasses, which snap photos while you wear them, we’re moments away from photographer Jeremy Kost presenting an exhibit of dudes and faux dongs.

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Via Queerty

There is no good news in this story. None. It’s sad, and it’s endemic of the nightmares today’s LGBT youth continue to face every. single. day. Asher Brown, a 13-year-old eighth grader at Hamilton Middle School outside Houston, shot himself in the head last week after being “bullied to death.”

Asher was tormented for being small. For his religious beliefs. For the way he dressed. And for being gay. His bullies acted out mock gay sex acts in phys ed class.

As is growing increasingly typical, Asher’s mother and stepfather Amy (pictured below) and David Truong say they notified administrators at the Harris, Texas school about how their son was being taunted. They say it’s been a year and a half since they first alerted the school, but no action was taken. Calls to the school went unanswered. The school, meanwhile, says it never received any calls. School district spokeswoman Kelli Durham insists no students or teachers registered complaints, either.

That statement infuriated the Truongs, who accused the school district of protecting the bullies and their parents. “That’s absolutely inaccurate — it’s completely false,” Amy Truong said. “I did not hallucinate phone calls to counselors and assistant principals. We have no reason to make this up. … It’s like they’re calling us liars.” David Truong said, “We want justice. The people here need to be held responsible and to be stopped. It did happen. There are witnesses everywhere.”

Asher took his own life with his stepfather’s 9 mm Beretta, which was “stored on one of the closet’s shelves.” There was no suicide note. His stepfather David found his body, lifeless, after coming home from work. “I thought he was laying there reading a book or something,” he says. “My son put a gun to his head because he couldn’t take what he was hearing and the constant teasing.”

His mother Amy came home to police sirens and yellow tape at her house. “They called him different names for being homosexual,” she says. “He just had enough.”

One report says Asher came out to his parents over the summer, and that they were so accepting he might have come out to his classmates. Another report says the morning of his death, Asher came out to David.

The day before, a student tripped him on the school steps and kicked his books all over the floor.

There’s no more room to debate whether LGBT kids need our protection. It’s inarguable. That American people, who love their children and their families and their sons and daughters and brothers and sisters can even fathom voting for bigots like Tom Emmer, who doesn’t think queer kids need our kindness and our strength and our safety, is unconscionable.

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